MIDTOWN — Moments after stepping outside for her commute during the city’s first heatwave, 28-year-old Sarah Perkins boldly announced she was ready for winter.
“I can’t wait for it to get cold again,” declared Perkins. “This city is basically a frying pan. I would rather deal with Rockefeller Christmas tree tourists than get cooked alive by standing on the subway platform.”
Perkins’ friends and family were shocked to hear the news.
“She spent January through April complaining about how short the days were. Also, it always gets this hot every year,” said Perkins’ brother DeAndre. “Sarah got her wish, but it sounds like the grass is always greener.”
When Sarah heard her brother’s comments, she rolled her eyes while wiping sweat off her face. “I don’t know what he’s talking about because in winter the grass is brown.”
The Pigeon Post 